John Mulaney Presents: Everybody’s in LA

I had a blast during my guest appearance on John Mulaney Presents: Everybody’s in LA which aired as a part of Netflix is a Joke. Check it out on the YouTube clip above.

Read Transcript

0:08

We’re gonna watch a few clips of stand-up comedians.

0:10

And being mental health professionals,

0:12

I’d like it if you gave me your assessment of what you see.

0:15

So, we’ll begin.

0:18

I didn’t hate my father.

0:20

My father wasn’t a bad guy.

0:22

For instance, I never once, not once, saw my dad hit my mother.

0:28

-Mm. -[audience laughs]

0:30

I mean, he was quick.

0:32

-And you can’t… -[audience laughs]

0:35

You can’t teach speed.

0:36

That comes from here.

0:38

[audience laughs]

0:39

I’ll never forget the one time I saw my dad’s penis.

0:44

[audience laughs]

0:47

I said, “Dad…

0:50

don’t text me shit like that.”

0:51

[audience laughs]

0:53

[man] Let’s pause there.

0:55

What’s your read on this comedian’s mental health?

0:58

He’s a trauma victim in my mind.

1:00

Um, you know, unresolved, deeply repressed.

1:04

My guess is he has difficulty expressing emotions,

1:07

poor interpersonal skills.

1:08

I would be concerned ’cause there’s a lot of repression here.

1:11

Yeah, I mean, I think anyone

1:13

that is casually talking about domestic violence,

1:16

that is a red flag.

1:17

And if he came to me and he is not married,

1:20

then I definitely would recommend a prenup.

1:22

I for sure think that he has depression and PTSD.

1:26

I want to see how often, if ever,

1:29

uh, does a picture of his father’s penis pop up when he’s sleeping at night.

1:32

Uh, does it disturb him from being able to get sleep?

1:35

It seems like it’s, uh, it’s a pretty sore spot.

1:38

[man] Let’s move on to our next subject.

1:41

We had to pull over at night at a gas station. Hmm.

1:45

My biggest fear: getting murdered.

1:48

[audience laughs]

1:49

Now, this one we pulled in,

1:51

the credit card machine didn’t work.

1:53

So, now I gotta go in that death hut.

1:55

[audience laughs]

1:57

That little mini mart.

1:59

You ever go into a mini mart at midnight?

2:03

There’s always a guy by the Gatorades just kind of looking at a Gatorade.

2:08

[audience laughs]

2:09

I’m waiting for him to just reload. [grunts]

2:12

[audience laughs]

2:17

[man] Okay.

2:18

I had four diagnoses.

2:20

So, one is paranoid personality disorder.

2:23

He imagines terrifying scenarios of harm, death,

2:26

to his family and friends.

2:27

I also threw in ADHD

2:29

’cause he has an impulsive, hyperactive quality to him.

2:32

And he’s got OCD in there,

2:34

a preoccupation with perfectionism and control.

2:37

He could be bipolar. It’s a mood disorder.

2:39

He could also have schizophrenia, which is a thought disorder.

2:42

He’d benefit from some mood stabilizers,

2:44

but probably antipsychotics,

2:46

-’cause we want to bring him down fast. -[man] Moving on.

2:49

So, roughly speaking, I gave my college about $120,000.

2:55

Okay? So you might say that I already gave them $120,000.

3:01

And now you have the audacity to ask me for more money?

3:06

What kind of a cokehead relative is my college?

3:10

You spent it already?

3:13

Where’s my money?

3:14

I felt like Jimmy Stewart in It’s a Wonderful Life

3:17

when he’s screaming at his Uncle Billy.

3:18

Like, “Where’s the money?

3:19

Where’s that money, you fat motherfucker?”

3:22

What diagnosis would you make here?

3:24

One, Peter Pan syndrome.

3:26

You know, they’re socially immature,

3:28

can’t really face adult responsibilities and realities.

3:31

If we were gonna look at celebrities

3:33

that may have had a Peter Pan type of complex and syndrome,

3:36

I would say Michael Jackson had a lot of that.

3:39

[man] Kojo, do you agree?

3:40

Uh, I got a bit of a different read on John’s mental health here.

3:44

Not to disagree with the former assessment,

3:46

but I believe that the majority, the large majority of his symptoms

3:49

can be explained by autism.

3:51

The cadence of how he moves on stage,

3:54

very rigid, very controlled.

3:56

The unbroken eye contact.

3:57

Also, the $120,000 was repeatedly mentioned.

4:01

And, uh, with a lot of people who are autistic,

4:04

there’s this strong sense of justice.

4:06

I also see histrionic personality disorder.

4:09

That’s when there’s a lot of theatrics.

4:11

-An admiration and praise junkie… -[inaudible dialogue]

4:13

…thrives on control and obedience of others.

4:16

If John was my client, um,

4:18

I would be worried about compulsive behaviors.

4:21

So, for John, I would just recommend

4:23

a limited conservatorship where, um, somebody could decide,

4:27

you know, whether he can purchase, make large purchases.

4:31

Somebody that can do that for him on his behalf until he gets better.

4:35

[man] With these diagnoses,

4:36

if John’s fame were to decrease, what would that be like for him?

4:39

It would be like a death.

4:41

It would be losing a part of him that he’s really, really enjoyed

4:44

and gotten a lot of validation for.

4:46

Because as his fame is decreasing

4:49

and that loss of identity kicks in,

4:52

he’s gonna rely on the people around him.

4:54

Those eight to 12 people who you’re the closest with,

4:57

Mom, Dad, managers, assistants.

4:59

Those people can look out for him, uh, as he deals with the anxiety

5:03

of not knowing what’s gonna come in the future.

5:06

Exactly.

FAQ

Coping with the emotional turmoil requires a support system, whether it’s friends, family, or a professional therapist. Engaging in self-care activities, establishing a routine, and giving yourself time to heal are crucial. Remember, it’s okay to seek help and to acknowledge your feelings during this challenging time.

Protecting your interests starts with hiring a competent divorce attorney who understands your goals and can advocate on your behalf. Document all assets, liabilities, and important interactions. Stay informed about your rights and the divorce process, and make decisions based on rational thought rather than emotion

Set clear boundaries and use written communication whenever possible. This provides a record of your interactions and can help avoid misunderstandings. Consider using a third-party communication service if direct interaction becomes too hostile or unproductive. Always keep conversations focused on the issue at hand, not personal grievances.

Shield your children from conflict and refrain from speaking negatively about your ex-spouse in their presence. Maintain consistency in their daily routines and be honest with them in an age-appropriate manner. Encourage them to express their feelings and consider professional counseling to help them cope with the changes in their family structure.

Our Clients Love Us!

Top Rated Divorce Attorney

Great attorney with a lot of experience and knowledge! Always willing to take the time to explain in detail all “attoney talk/court language.” Goes above and beyond expectations!

-Heather B.

Top Rated Family Attorney

Made a difficult divorce process easier to understand and navigate. Mrs. Jafari is assertive and yet very personable. Mrs. Jafari was very hands on and personally made all the court appearances. I felt supported by this law firm and the staff is wonderful.

-Alejandra P.

Best Divorce Lawyer Top Rated Divorce Attorney

Professional law firm. Helped to resolve a high conduct divorce for me and my kids. Would recommend.

-Tony T.

Top Rated Domestic Violence Attorney Top Rated Family Attorney

Padideh is a safe place for children and all survivors of domestic violence. When Padideh is working, she is living her purpose; radiating knowledge and integrity. My life, and the lives of my daughters are forever changed for the better, because of Mrs. Jafari and her commitment to Justice and making the world a more equitable and safe place.

-Priscella J.

Top Rated Prenuptial Agreement Attorney Top Rated Postnuptial Agreement Attorney

Used Padideh as my lawyer for a prenup and she was incredibly helpful, and knowledgeable. It was clear she had vast experience in this field and how to protect my money.

-Adam I.

Similar Articles

Check out our latest blog posts.

View All
View All

Get Your Consultation Today

(310) 880-4541

Follow Us

    Contact Us

    Follow Us

    Call Now Button